Reasons You Keep Ending Up in the Friend Zone

Does this sound familiar? You meet someone you really like, you want to move things in a romantic direction, but she or he only views you as a “friend” and nothing more. If this is a situation that you can relate to, then it’s time to take a closer look at why you’re getting friend-zoned rather than making it to the end zone. And once you can understand why your romantic interests keep going unrequited, you can swap your role of “friend” for “boyfriend” in the future.

  1. You’re not making the first move. If you’re wondering why you’re staying in the friend category, the first step is to review your interactions with this person. In many cases, you may end up getting the friend label simply because you never took the initiative to actually ask her or him out. In fact, if you never truly made your intentions known, then it’s likely that this person sees you as a friend because you didn’t give her or him the clear impression that you’re interested. So rather than staying silent, take the not-so-subtle approach and make a move.
  2. You’re afraid of rejection. With this in mind, another reason why you keep ending up in the friend zone is that you’re not taking any risks. However, if you’re too afraid of getting turned down, you won’t be able to turn your relationship with someone into more than just a friendship. It’s time to face the fact that rejection is part of dating, so get used to it, get over it, and get on with it.
  3. You’re too available. Another reason why you keep ending up in the friend zone is that you’re trying too hard to win this person over. And while it may seem counterintuitive, bending over backwards for someone and changing your plans for her or him at the drop of a hat will likely put you in the running for BFF rather than BF. Remember, a little intrigue can go a long way.
  4. You’re lacking confidence. An additional reason why you keep falling in the friend zone has to do with your self-esteem. In fact, if you’re feeling badly about yourself and refuse to see all that you have to offer, a potential love interest won’t be able to see it, either. The bottom line is that if you want someone to see you as boyfriend material rather than just a friend, you have to be your own best friend and believe that you’re worth it.